Culture

Monday Morning Roundtable: Christmas gifts

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This week, the Heave staff was asked:

What’s the best Christmas present you ever got as a kid?

Nick Lang
Herpes.

Amy Dittmeier
My first electric bass. It was my first step into muscianship, and I still remember going with my dad to guitar center to pick it out, grazing through the selection until I found the right one. I still have it, although I’ve found a new bassy love since then, because it’s the instrument that I learned everything on and played my first gig on. The memories it holds alone make it the best gift I’ve ever gotten.

Dominick Mayer
Grand Theft Auto: Vice City. That came at a weird transitional period for me, because I’m a Christmas obsessive who, only about three or four years before, discovered that Santa wasn’t necessarily as real as he’d hoped. Now, both of my sisters are too old to believe, so now I’m the only person in my house who does and it’s kinda weird because I’m almost 23 and it’s not cute anymore. But I digress. Anyway, GTA was the forbidden fruit, the ultimate gem missing from my collection during the height of my gaming phase because my parents watched Fox News at that time and didn’t want me beating up hookers. Luckily, my impassioned wishes and the affirming spirit of Christmas united to make absolute certain that I would assume the body of Ray Liotta and beat up hookers. Truly a Christmas I can one day tell the grandchildren about.