Nothing Bad Will Ever Happen
Release Date: Aug 14, 12
In 2010, Dignan Porch released its first album, Tendrils, which was mostly a solo project for member Joe Walsh. Now, with a full band, they release Nothing Bad Will Ever Happen on the Captured Tracks label.
On the opening track “Picking Up Dust,” Dignan Porch doesn’t go out of their way to excel beyond what the title implies. The song is a bit mundane, ordinary, and seriously derivative. Perhaps the placement of the song at the front of the track list was a bad choice, as “Sad Shape” quickly turns a corner. It may be just as derivative in its squelchy, shoe-gazing style, but it delivers it within a layer authenticity. And while this British band makes several interesting creative choices, it feels as if most of the time they are hiding behind the fuzzy haze of each song. “Darkness” for example, gets really provocative near the end, but the repetition drones about in a trepidatious way.
Much of Nothing Bad Will Happen has these tiny sparks to it, but the songs become boring. Maybe something bad should happen. “Pink Oil” has a fun title, but there is nothing fun or surprising to the track. It meanders along to a shrill riff and cumbersome drums. There’s nearly an arrogance to how lazy these songs are arranged. That is to say that the songs are presented with this nonchalance, an attitude that they actually sound good. This is especially present on “Sleep With the Dead,” which sounds like a good effort, until you really listen to it, but doesn’t dare to find a unique quality. Same could said for “Never.” Dignan Porch manages to create the illusion of good songs with songs that aren’t. “Sixteen Hits” may be the best track on the album. It takes chances, has a more potent groove. Yet and still, it sounds too much like other songs that have come before. “You Win You Win” is good, but it just sounds like all the other songs that almost sound good. No. No one wins.
But because of a bit of buzz the band has gotten, their mediocrity will pass along and have a moment of momentum because of fans who think they are supposed to like it, or who are told to like it. Then it will pass. Too bad they’re too late for festival season.