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“Bob’s Burgers” review: “The Equestranauts”

equestranauts

Sweet mother of God. Never before has Bob’s Burgers straddled the line between fun and disturbing with such poise. Every moment feels like it could make your day or haunt your dreams forever. Yet that’s the beauty of it all. So many questions are raised in a very swift half hour of Bob’s Burgers. The Equesticles, the men who love the horse-starring The Equestranauts, are a weird bunch. Are they just fanboys? Is this a sexual thing as well? I don’t really know, and it really gets under my skin. Luckily, these men are portrayed as the bizarre villains of the first episode authored by Dan Mintz, the voice of Tina. It’s always interesting when a cast member takes up writing or directing an episode, even if the latter action is often more an honorary role than anything. The power of writing an episode can be a complicated one, but Mintz’ episode stands out in its uncompromising qualities. Where he could easily make this episode all about Tina, he uses the character in the proper way: the motivation and the moral.

Start with the creation of The Equestranauts, a fictional cartoon akin to My Little Pony but with a Power Rangers touch. Like Teen Girl Squad of Homestar Runner, I would love to see three-minute shorts with this new entity. Will that ever happen? Absolutely not, but I can dream, dammit. Living in a generation where Adventure Time is valued as much as Game of Thrones, nothing surprises me that for every teenage girl who loves The Equestranauts there are four grown men in cosplay. More importantly, the element of horses creates a disturbing undercurrent. Maybe it’s because I saw Bronies too recently, but I figured these men are all into each other as much as they’re into the horse cartoon.

But the horse element is played properly. These men come off more as dorks who probably haven’t had a sexual experience in their lives. They’re man-children more in love with a silly cartoon than anything else. Paul F. Tompkins leads the group of Equesticles. Now, I’m still not really sure who Paul F. Tompkins is. No one really gives me a straight answer. As a quirky guy with a moustache, he does just fine for me. If I’m missing something, may the judgment of all fandom strike me down! He swindles poor little Tina into giving away her rare Chariot toy. Tina has crossed the line into the adult world, which means Bob has to get involved. As Tina proclaims that he must go undercover as an Equesticle, my eyes as well as Louise’s simply light up with ecstasy. The situation has everything Tina loves, but nothing Bob wants to do. Tina’s happiness matters too much to Bob, though. He will go through any indignity for her. That’s the value of the Belcher family. Homer and Marge love one another. Brian and Stewie need each other as much as they hate each other. The Belchers need each other to be happy to get through a week.

Lovers of H. Jon Benjamin’s other role, Archer, likely hoped for a tattoo to be given to Bob in a similar fashion. Disappointment comes on this front, but that’s a small disappointment within an episode I may have to call the series’ best. As we’ve somehow already made it to over 60 episodes, the show is well into maturity. The issue of staying fresh can be worrisome. However, if a new writing force can emerge within the production’s rank, the longevity is in good hands. The real question will always be ratings for this show, but I’m not worried for the moment. Outliving The Cleveland Show is a start.

Meanwhile, I’m writing a spec episode of Bob’s Burgers where Bob’s niece and nephew come to visit for the weekend. I’m having a lot of fun creating sexual tension between Tina and her older, male cousin.  

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