Head to Head: Robots


This week on Head to Head: Amy and Dan considered: In your opinion, who is the coolest robot?

Amy Dittmeier

Two of my favorite movies – Metropolis and Blade Runner – have seminal representations of robots in our culture. They’re cool, sleek, and futuristic. They’re killers, lovers, fighters, slaves. They’re a part of cinema history. But this question is asking for the coolest robot, not the best robot. Therefore I have to go with Gigolo Joe from A.I. Artificial Intelligence. The movie itself isn’t really good (I still wonder what it would’ve been like if Kubrick directed it), but Jude Law as Gigolo is one of the few reasons I would rewatch it. Pleasurebots just make sense. There’s no fear or pregnancy or STDs. They’re discreet, they can morph to your preferences. Unlike those weird Real Dolls, they can interact with you and be what you want them to be. Also, they can take credit cards I’m guessing, making it easier to keep your nighttime endeavors on the DL. The capitalist in me says these need to exist now.

Dan Chruscinski

Robots today are complete wusses compared to the 80s. Yeah, you keep your werewolf-hating sparkly robots and I’ll stick to worshiping the greatest artificial intelligence ever created: the Robotic Operating Buddy, codenamed R.O.B.. Sure, the Terminator can terminate and Gigolo Joe can imitate soon-to-be past their prime British actors, but R.O.B. can do something no other robot has accomplished. He can evolve. Originally this Nintendo accessory was able to open and close his plastic hands and rotate his head 45 degrees. Sounds pretty lame right? Well how about when R.O.B. appeared in Super Smash Brothers Brawl as a full on killing machine? Skynet’s circuits fried as it witnessed R.O.B. brutally massacre an entire army of Pokemon while still finding time to chat up Princess Zelda. If R.O.B. is an indication of the robot uprising, I’ll gladly kneel before him.

  • Both of you are wrong. The best robot is a toss up between Bender of Futurama fame and the Vision from the Avengers.