Culture

Monday Morning Roundtable: Instrumentals

guitar

This week, the Heave staff was asked: You can immediately learn any instrument (that you don’t currently play). Which one, and why?

Joe Anderson

Banjo. I’d reach moderate popularity doing Annie Lennox bluegrass covers. If no one remembers who Annie Lennox is, I can pass the covers off as originals. Win/win.

Wes Soltis

I don’t play any instruments, so I’ll go with piano. You learn the piano and you can pretty much learn any other instrument. Throughout high school and college I had the dream of being the “sensitive┬áviolin player” of an indie group (blame Kind Of Like Spitting). I assumed girls would see me on stage┬ádelicately playing my violin and would think that I would be the perfect person to raise their children or something. Now I think girls in the crowd would be like, “Ugh, who is that weird dude trying too hard on stage with his violin?”

Amy Dittmeier

Drums. Hands down. My boyfriend is a fantastic drummer and has tried to teach me on many occasions and failed each time. There’s something about the drums I can’t quite master. It would be cool to go apeshit on the drums and actually sound good.

Dominick Mayer

I almost want to cheat on this and just say I wish I hadn’t stopped playing the french horn; after about seven years I quit on it, due to the potent combination of 17-year-old apathy, a discovery that I just wanted to play folk punk (didn’t quite happen for me) and a meager handful of overbearing high school band directors. That aside, I’ll just say the synthesizer/keyboard. Considering that I have soft spots for both new wave and chiprock, I just really wish I could do that. Plus, at that point I’d be a mere hop, skip and jump away from the keytar.